Powerful stuff.

http://www.matrixmasters.com/world/usnews/WarPresidentMosaic.html

This work was originally posted on the blog American Leftist on April 07, 2004.

Tip from Sara. Merci.

A bag designer out of Washington state placed these laundry labels in his bags. The translation of the last phrase at the bottom is: "We are sorry that our President is an idiot. We did not vote for him."

The company has now designed a t-shirt featuring the label and all proceeds are going to the Seattle Vet Center to support their Homeless Vet Program. Click here to find out which bags have the labels. You can order bags (cool, but pricey) and t-shirts via the website.

Thanks to Nomad for the tip on this one.

So, this news, like the bakesale is also old, but important anyways. It's strange. When there is not a lot going on in my life, I have all this time to reflect on the little things, but when I start to get overwhelmed, it's like my brain quits processing information and I don't even know what to write about it.

BUT anyway, while I was away skiing, Stéphane closed on our new apartment! Well, really it is HIS apartment, but he is being kind enough to let me crash their indefinitely. And I even get to help pick out furniture! For those that know Paris, the apartment is located in the 11th near rue Oberkampf. For those of you that don't know Paris, the apartment is in, um, Paris... It's in this funky modern building where the mailboxes are kept in these giant, blue and white eggs. Our apartment is a 2-bedroom on the ground floor and looks out on a courtyard and a garden. It is cool. Right now we're having some work done on it, but we hope to move sometime in June.

Pictures to come soon!

Ok, so this post is actually about my noble friends who participated in the "Bake Back the White House" event way back on April 17. I am reclaiming the word waffle because it is a funny pun AND pointing out that the whole idea of a bake sale was a sort of slap in the face to the crazy right wing talk show hosts that think "waffling" is a good insult. Waffles are yummy and even if you say it, intending a negative connotation, most people will think of yummy Belgian waffles piled high with fruit and whipped cream or their less sophisticated but equally heavenly cousin, the Eggo swimming in Aunt Jemima's finest maple-flavored syrup. It's like Pavlov's dogs...once we start thinking about waffles, it's hard to go negative.

Sara and Daryl unveil the ultimate weapon while Kevin uses telepathic brainwashing to create a young democrat

But this is not an ode to the waffle, it is an ode to Sara and Kevin and Daryl and all their spectacular friends who raised over $1000 for the John Kerry campaign last Saturday. Click here to see more photos from the event.

And now a report from the chocolatey, buttery trenches by Sara Mayer:

"We had up to 10 people at a time manning our tables and contributions from over a dozen bakers - several folks from the cocteau were involved, Kristina Klebe was my co-coordinator, Carolyn Ratteray, Daryl Wattson, and Kevin Held helped man the tables as well as Kristina's friends Lisa Maria, Brent, Alison and another girl, we had additional contributions of baking from Kelli Holsopple and a few others as well as member of the Jean Cocteau Repertory helping to print John Kerry flyers etc. It was a beautiful day and the air rang with such incensing phrases as "Beat Bush w/Brownies!!" "Cookies for Kerry" "Democracy
Fresh from the Oven" or Kevins's favorite, "We've got cupcakes! We've got cookies! We've got convictions!!"

Check out the press release and you'll see that we raised over $750,000 (with more info coming in) and participated in the "World's Largest Bakesale"!!! The moveon page also has a fun interactive map w/pix from sales around the country. The money was raised to support the group’s efforts to remove George Bush from office in November".

'MoveOn.org formed a Political Action Committee (PAC) so that like-minded, concerned citizens can influence the outcome of congressional elections, and in turn, the balance of power in Washington, D.C. MoveOn.org's intention is to provide individuals, who normally have little political power, to aggregate their contributions with others to gain a greater voice in the political process.' - excerpt from statement of purpose from the website

The bakesale was an awesome event with over 53 happening in the NYC area!! 49 of the 50 states in the union hosted them (sorry North Dakota) And it took place on the first beautiful day of the year!! WE sold:
brownies, rice krispie treats, pb rice krispie treats, choc chip cookies, biscotti, banana bread, pumpkin cranberry muffins, banana bread muffins, blueberry muffins, and cinammon roles - all homemade!! (kevin also brought some pretty bakery cupcakes) and we had water and oj for free. We helped over 1/2 doz people to register as voters and handed out over 100 leaflets on Kerry as well as registered 20 new members of moveon."

...to my funeral, which will take place on July 12, 2079. More details on the time and location as the date approaches.

deathclock.com

Ok, so as an early birthday present Stephane gave me the new Blonde Redhead disc, Misery is a Butterfly. Not only am I enjoying the music, but I have to say, that it is nice to have the object. The packaging is beautiful, nice soft case, gorgeous liner notes. So I think that I want to start buying CDs again (it has been a longtime...). So here is my question to all of you. What albums do you think are truly worth owning, that you would buy instead of downloading?

NOTE: Right now let's stick to CDs, because I won't have a turntable available for a few months.

Here are some blogs of note that my friends either run or have pointed out to me. For those who's procrastination needs far outshine the capability of Mandounette:

New to neat sites:
Zibili: The one and only Hiro (aka Lord Procrastinator) picks out the weirdest from the media. 3-eyed, 2-mouthed calves, a cat that owns a house, a dog saves another dog from an alligator attack, and much, much more.

Other sites of note:

The Private Intellectual: A Study of Decline - Benjamin Dueholm provides some smart commentary on everybody's favorite political topics

Wil Wheaton dot NET: Yes, he was in Star Trek but his blog is funny and I like his writing. A cornerstone of geek culture. Love the idea of an audio blog and a photo blog. Perhaps this summer, if I have some time I will institute those on Mandounette.

That's all for now.

For those of you that desire a visual reference. Here is Karebear posing with MiniKiss after we caught a glimpse of them sliding out of their "limousine" (a normal sized Sedan) outside of 2A (um, 2nd St and Ave. A) after the Guinness Book longest locomotion attempt. (see post Did you know... from April 21)


Photo by Stephane

My friend George (pictured here at the International UFO Museum in Istanbul) is coming to France for the summer. Yay!!! He will be "documenting and analyzing the World Heritage Site of St. Emilion" near Bordeaux in Aquitaine, perhaps the most famous wine region in the world. So this means that, come July, I will be hopping the TGV to Bordeaux to throw a few back with the great George-ini. I think that I have been to more places with George than anyone else; we have traversed 4 continents together! But never have we been to wine country together. Oh wait, yes we have. The Senior Week Wine Tour of Seneca Lake in 2001. How could I forget? 5 hours of free wine, a team of designated drivers, and some "Girls Gone Wild" moments would make anyone want to forget. I think I will try to be a little classier in St. Emilion. Anyway, I am counting down the days 'til his arrival!

• World's Fattest Twins (remember that picture of them on their motorcycles???)
  
  
• World's Longest Fingernails (that Indian dude with the curly nails!)
  
  
• World's largest Ice Cream Sundae...just because I love ice cream.

...that the Guinness Book of World Records was originally published by the Guinness brewery as a reference for settling trivia disputes in pubs? I read that in the obituary of Norris McWhirter, who co-founded the book with his twin brother, Ross, in 1954. Norris died on Monday.

Some funky Guinness-related stories. Last summer, me and a crew of hardcore dancers participated in what was meant to be the Guinness world record for the longest locomotion at Tompkins Square Park as a part of the Howl! Festival. Don't know if we made it in the book (it was kind of chaotic), but we did get to meet Mini Kiss afterwards. (ps-Does anyone have a digitial version of that great photo of Karebear and the band that they could send me? I seem to have lost mine and I would love to post it!)

AND, Sara has recently informed me that her bakesale, which raised over $1000 for the MoveOn sponsored "Bake Back the White House", may be part of the Guinness Book's largest ever simultaneous bake-sale, with 1,100 bake sales taking place on April 17. More on that later when she sends me the info.

An article that appeared in The Progressive and Le Monde Diplomatique by Howard Zinn (A People's History of the United States) that reminds us that for every American soldier killed in Iraq, 4 or 5 are seriously wounded, meaning blinded, paralysed, or losing their arms, legs or both. Read it.

Go to Google, type in failure and then hit the "I'm feeling lucky" button. It's funny...

So, I had virtually no power left on my camera, but just enought to take this photo from my room. I had visions of making a film of me skiing and everything, but alas, this is all you get. This photo is funny. It looks like a painting because I had the resolution set too low. Oh, well...

New Year's Day, 1985. Age 5. Mandounette breaks her nose and suffers a severe concussion when the sled she is riding in flies into a tree at the bottom of the 2nd hill at Ellison Park. Her father, who was steering, bailed off the sled moments before impact, but "forgot" to save his daughter. Her mother finds it funny to call her Rocky Balboa. However, Mandounette is the envy of the entire kindergarten, inspiring Erica T. to throw herself off a jungle gym, breaking her nose, in order to look just like Mandounette.

1990. Age 10. Mandounette is leveled by a 5-person toboggan at the bottom of the 2nd hill at Ellison Park, causing a second concussion for Mandounette and a nasty bloody nose for the kid that was at the front of the toboggan.

1994. Age 14. Mandounette puts on downhill skis for the first time. She bullets out of her group lesson, refusing to do a snowplow turn, and, in race position, flies into a pine forest, where she wipes out magnificently. As she had not yet learned to get up on skis, she believes that she will freeze to death, hidden behind the trees, until her brother, who witnessed the whole event, comes to her rescue. She spends the rest of the day drinking sodas in the lodge, cursing whoever inventing skiing.

1997. Age 17. Mandounette doesn't hurt herself sledding, but does get her car stuck in the snow at the top of the 2nd hill at Ellison Park.

1999. Age 19. Mandounette tries skiing for the 2nd time. She doesn't fall as much, but still doesn't understand what the big deal is.

2004. Age 25. Mandounette spends a full week in the Alps, where there is nothing to do but ski. She takes lessons from a crazy French ski instructor (think Hank Azaria in Along Came Polly, only with just one eye) who has her doing tricks in the half-pipe by the third day. Screw snowplowing! Mandounette is parallel-skiing! She is leaping off of moguls (ok, she hasn't quite learned how to go between them), conquering red pistes (not ready for black yet, see note about the moguls), and trying to go as fast as she can. She finally falls in love with the sport. "Glisser, c'est un plaisir." She is now counting the days until next winter.

I received an e-mail this morning from a friend of mine who I haven't heard from in a long time, congratulating on my defection from the US of A. And it is true that by moving to France I have made a small, personal statement about my sentiments against the lying liars (nod to Al Franken) of the current administration, the backwards motion of big business politics, a war that is unfolding exactly how I said it would when I was on the streets protesting in NYC last year, a population of idiots who have trouble making the link between their Super-sized meals and their obesity, and a plethora of other annoyances. I started off today basking in the expatriate life, shuddering at the thought of where I come from. But another e-mail from another friend put a quick end to my contempt and ushered in a wave of nostalgia. The message read:

"Subject: happy day

Dude, it's 4-20!

Yay!"

I have tried explaining the concept of 4-20 to foreigners before, but it is a lot like trying to explain an inside joke to someone on the outside. They may understand it, but they just don't get it. I guess you had to be there…

But, anyway, I am honored to come from a country where one day a year is consecrated to the herb of champions. And it makes me remember that for every lame-o there is in the US, there are 10 people who kick ass. Ok, maybe 7. But still…

I will be celebrating in France, although nothing can replace a wake'n'bake followed by breakfast at Dino's, or vaporizing and watching Dark Side of the Rainbow in my parents basement, or being mesmerized by the donuts as they wheeled around on the conveyor belt at the old Krispy Kreme on 8th Street (may it rest in peace). I hope you are all able to find the time for a little toke today or at least a minute to reflect on some beautiful memories we have all shared with the little weed. Nobody beats the Wiz!

So, after a crazy week of trying to balance massive amounts of work, a really annoying illness, and continuing to decipher my life plan, I am leavin' town! That's right, it is spring break and I am actually taking a trip. I am off to Club Med with Stephane's mother and sister (and possibly his brother). We will spend a full week at La Plagne, in the French Alps, eating and skiing, or if you are me, rolling around in the snow trying to figure out how to get up, then saying "Fuck it" and going to drink a beer at the bar. Any that have been skiing with me in the past are certainly in a panic about now, thinking I will kill myself or others. We shall see. Considering my only other skiing experiences were at Greek Peak in Western New York (yes, you are right, there are no mountains in Western New York) it should be an interesting move to be at a place with 150 ski LIFTS and a view of the highest peak in the Alps!!! I am a little nervous, but I think it will be fun. I am signed up for 5 hours of lessons a day, so by the time I am done I hope to be an expert. I even bought my very own ski pants, which are very sexy. I was modeling them for Stephane, swooshing back and forth in the middle of the room. He suggested that I just fall to the floor as that is probably how I will look for the better part of 7 days.

But anyway, I will be away until April 17th, which means that Mandounette will be hibernating for a week. But there will be lots to report, I am sure, upon my return. I will send out an e-mail to let you all know when new posts are going up. Until then, go and see Jim Jarmusch's Coffee & Cigarettes if you can (I don't know if it has been released in the US yet or if it was released long ago and I just don't know) or spend time praying to Jesus, Buddha, or your breakfast cereal that I don't break my head.

Until then,
Your very spoiled Mandounette

They should be!

But who cares? I just got word from TurboTax that both of my returns were accepted AND if that isn't enough, I got a little bit of money back even! This shocks me. As a "business owner," I usually get screwed up the ass by all kinds of little details like the "New York City we hate you, entrepreneur" flat tax which is the same for someone like me as someone who makes millions, or the "Small Business Owner shut your piehole" tax. But this year, I got a total of $130 back. Of course, most of it went to paying the TurboTax fee, but let me just say, I don't know where I would be without them! I filed in 2 hours (and my taxes are inevitably a bitch as I move every three months and make a lot of my money through my own business). No paper work. Nothin'. I already have the money in my account! So, I hereby declare April 7, I Love TurboTax Day. If you haven't done your taxes yet, I highly recommend it. They will always save you money and it takes no time at all. You're worth it! I just wish I had come up with the idea for TurboTax. These people must make a killing...

Isn't it funny that when you benefit from the system, all of a sudden you embrace it...? I guess that's what the problem is.

Ok, ok. I know. You have all so anxiously been awaiting my birthday report. If this is any indication, I have been laying face down on my bed alternately hacking and moaning since the faithful event. Truth is, I came down with a pretty nasty fever the day before my birthday, but convinced myself that it was just allergies, and that 4 hours in a smoke-filled cave would be the next best thing to a hypoallergenic bubble. In retropsect, I probably should've cancelled the festivities and gone to bed. Instead I participated in a hedonistic orgy of self-medication...caipirinhas, cosmos, Fée Vertes (that translates literally as "green fairies", and consists of flaming absinthe...). So I felt just great! I drank, I talked, I opened presents, I talked, I danced, I sang Serge Gainsbourg songs over the tech house background, I could no longer talk, I mobilized troups to another bar where many Fee Vertes were consumed (thought the Flaming Moe's song while my drink and the bar were being lit on fire, although could no longer sing). All-in-all, a good time was had by all. Oh, and get this. People here actually give presents! I was shocked! I received all kinds of fun things and was astounded by how people who barely know me were able to choose things that were so perfect for my personality...like sake in a juice box (with a bendy straw and everything) or a foot massager that looks like a torture device. But enough about presents. Everyone was thanked profusely the more and more I drank.

The next day, I figured that I was just tired from the night before. Went about my day as normal. Found that everyone was being really nice to me: the lady who offered to take my garbage down for me, the two boys who threw themselves in front of the metro doors to keep them open for me (and metro doors in Paris are not quite as forgiving as NY subway doors; they'll take your arm off)...went to a really neat restaurant with Stephane called L'Auberge du Clou, which was founded in 1883 and frequented by several generations of artists including Toulous-Lautrec, Erik Satie, Claude Debussy, Jean Cocteau...I thought it would be all touristy, but it wasn't at all. It was adorable and the food was yummy. I had the best dessert I've ever had in my life: tarte à l'orange brulée. I know it doesn't sound like much, but it was divine. And that dessert pretty much marked the peak of my birthday experience. After that I pretty much spent 4 days moping around and coughing everytime I tried to say something.

As you can guess, nothing held much interest for me (except watching Bridget Jones' Diary and reading Naked by David Sedaris) and my blog suffered. I apologize. I have been having many blog-like thoughts that I have been to weak to realize. Like introducing the "wedgie" to France via Stephane's 8-year old sister. Or thinking I could learn to love Gefilte fish and then nearly vomiting when I gave it a second chance. But alas, these fleeting giggles will not be immortalized, as Mandounette combats a nasty case of consumption.

I woke up early today (ok...9:30, but give me some credit, it's Sunday), walked down my street, which is really the main artery that goes through my little city (population around 20,000) and joined the raging crowd of 6 to cheer on the runners in the Paris Marathon. Somehow I thought it would be easier to spot my friend who was running, but there were thousands of them! All making me feel guilty that it took all of my energy simply to walk down the street to watch them run by. But seriously, I was so proud of my friend. She even managed to yell out my name as she went by! AND she told me that after the marathon, she would love to run with me and show me the ropes. I have a running trainer! Perhaps next year I will participate...although I will probably wind up like this dork I saw today walking and yelling "So, where are you from again?...Well, it was nice talking to you. I'm done!" throwing in the towel at Kilometer 11.

But more than anything, I was just glad to be up and out of the house relatively early to experience an absolutely divine April morning in Paris. And this year, I have to say that springtime in Paris is all it is cracked up to be. Yeah, my lungs are on fire from the pollen and I have absolutely no capacity for speech (screaming for my friend as she ran by was pretty much the last straw for my already feeble vocal cords), but that's because where I come from (lovely Rochester, NY) there is no spring. We go right from winter to summer, sometime in late May, so there is no time for pollen allergies to develop. I have absolutely no immunity to spring. But how great is it to be able to come out of hibernation nearly 2 full months before! Oh, I am just overflowing with springtime exuberance! (cough, cough). Sorry, excitiment tends to exacerbate my ailments...I am off to take some more fine over-the-counter medication. And so goes the life of the old lady Mandounette...